Remember back in middle school when people would pass notes to each other and ask, “Do you like me?”, followed by the instructions, “Circle YES or NO.” I remember being in 6th grade and thinking this girl named Erin, sitting on the other side of the room was cute so wrote just such a note. I can’t tell you why in the world writing a note in that moment seemed like the most logical course of action to discover the feelings a girl I liked. But, I wrote and carefully folded my note, writing her name on the front, and began the process of secretly passing it through the other 10 people sitting between me and her. And then I waited, feeling like all the hope of my future happiness would be determined through one simple circle. I watched with bated breath as the note slowly made its way back to me, my heart beating with anticipation. As the 10 pair of eyes who took part in passing the paper stared, I carefully unfolded the note- much like one carefully cuts a bomb wire, hoping it won’t explode in their face. Unfortunately, this bomb did explode, and with it my heart and all hopes of future happiness fell to the floor in pieces. Instead of circling either answer, Erin wrote at the bottom, “Let’s just be friends,” which is 6th grade vernacular for, “I’m just not that into you.”
As I’m in a place in my life where I’m considering where to work next, I feel like I’m back in 6th grade, passing notes asking, “Do you want me to work for you? Circle YES or NO.” It’s a vulnerable place to be. There’s a temptation to push yourself forward, to make sure people really know what you have to offer and who you are. But, I find that in the job search, much like dating, sometimes you feel it and sometimes you don’t. If someone’s not that into you, then there’s probably nothing you can do about it. You have to remember that you have great things to offer the right person, and instead of worrying about the one who said no, you have to accept, “They’re just not that into you.” And that’s ok.
As I was praying about my future this morning, I came upon Psalms 127:1 which says, ‘Unless the LORD builds the house, the builders labor in vain.” I love this verse because it’s a reminder that unless the Lord has a hand in a potential job, or relationship, or really anything, then it’s not going to work out so well for us. We can push and fight and force, but our efforts would be as useful as trying to push down a brick wall with our bare hands.
Sometimes we have to wait to see what the Lord is building. We have to watch. I wonder how many times you and I try to build something for God, but that activity does not genuinely come from His work in us. If that’s the case, the Bible says we are building in vain. We might as well try to win a sword fight with a toothpick, or build a snowman on a hot Hawaiian beach.
Oswald Chambers writes, “Many today are spending and being spent in work for Jesus Christ, but they do not walk with him.” I began to wonder what God is presently building in me. What work of value is God forging in the fires of ambiguity and waiting?
What about you? What is God presently building in your life? Will you allow God to build in your life or are you trying to build on your own? If you’re waiting for a job, or really any kind of answer or break through, it may not come in the manner or timing that you’d like. It may not even be the answer you were hoping for. Maybe your “Erin” just wants to be “friends.”
But, I believe God is at work and it’s in these moments that we turn our eyes to heaven and hold on to our heavenly Father.
Today, if you are waiting, turn your attention toward heaven. What is the Lord saying to you?